The irrational fear of toast

So if you’ll join me on my weaning journey, I’ll explain how the title above has some relevance.

We started project wean when miss baby was around 5 and a half months old, beginning where most do, baby rice. So after our first successful but messy meal we felt ready to take on the world of weaning. Creating mixtures that may smell and taste pleasant in the eyes of baby, but would not recommend trying yourself. Vom.

An illness later, we are back on track and trying new things, and as it turns out miss baby gets bored of a taste very quickly, so after breakfasts switching between banana porridge and baby rice, something new needed to be added to the mix.

Well cue the toast.

After toasting some bread, cutting off the crusts and putting the thinnest layer of butter on that is humanly possible, it’s cut into slices and placed in front of the obviously starving human.

She loved it, going for the one bit I each hand technique, something I think we can all get behind.

Now here’s where the fear creeps in…

While she has the concept of picking up and bringing to her mouth, what she hasn’t quite grasped is how much is too much when placing food in her own mouth, mainly just trying to shove the whole thing up in there. So of course I am watching her like a hawk, as any parent would when a choking hazard is in play. Then it happened, too big a bite, a red face and a lot of coughing.

Well mum instincts kicked in, she was out of her high chair and being pat on the back in a motion so quick if you’d blinked you’d have missed it. Basically, really fucking fast.

After a moment, some water and some finger scooping on my part, the too big bit of wet congealed toast was removed and she was back on track awaiting her next bit. Completely unfazed.

It’s alright for some, me on the other hand, is still completely traumatised, and giving her toast is now a terrifying process that flares some deep seated anxiety I never knew existed.

Yes, I have given her toast since, is it very often though? Not at all. The fear is real and I think for now it’s going to stay a now and then thing.